Employment

So. I'm now employed. I think it is terrible that I already know I won't like it. I've worked 4 days. That's it. It's sort of nice having something to do. It's nice having somewhere to go. I don't mind how tired I am. I just hate retail. It rots my brain. I'm a hair stylist, not a retail slave. That sounds so arrogant. I'm lucky to have a job, but I guess in a way I feel like I deserve more.

I don't want to go into specifics on where I work, but I work in a store (duh) at a booth where we sell cell phones. Nothing too bad, I don't really mind it. The part that I don't like is that it isn't doing hair. I spent a year of my life going to school and working my ass off to be good at hair, so I could get licensed to do hair, so I could get a job doing hair. It got me nowhere.

The only salon jobs out here are booth rental which totally sucks. I can't afford to pay rent to work right now. On top of that I would have to pay for all of my product and equipment. I also have a teensy clientèle since I'm just out of school.

Part of me is scared that I'll forget. Practice makes perfect, and the more I was doing hair the better and faster I was. I don't want to have to start all over. Also, who wants to hire someone who doesn't have a job for 6 months after they graduate school, and then that job is selling phones? Really?

I feel like I've failed. Steve is the only person I can talk to about it, and he doesn't get it. I mean, he understands the concept of why I feel bad, but he thinks the fact that I have any job at all is great. Which it is, don't get me wrong. I'm really glad I was able to find a job when there are so few here. I enjoy money. Really.

How can I not feel bad though? All through cosmo school, and even after, people kept telling me how they just KNEW I would do good. They knew I would be successful. How can I do that when I can't even get a job? I honestly don't think I'll get a job as a stylist until I move out somewhere else.

I have newses! Yes, newses.

I am a terrible blogger. I've admitted it in the past, and I'll admit it now. I suck.

I actually have a pretty good excuse this time! I moved. I didn't move very far, but I did in fact move. I probably lived with my parents longer than any of my friends. Hell, Steve moved out when he was 16. Anyway, I'm 20, and I'm now out of my parents home.

This might sound weird, but let me tell you something. I would probably be fine if I lived with my parents until I moved with Steve. However, I have some things I want. I want to know that I can take care of myself. I want to be able to live on my own before I spend the rest of my life living with someone. Ok, so I didn't make a huge leap right away. I moved in with my sister and her husband. I'm taking baby steps though. I'm hoping to be in my own place by the end of the year.


I WILL be buying a new charger for my laptop next week, so I really hope to get back into the swing of blogging.

And just for a bonus, here's two of my new roomies.

Let's talk Steven.

So I just realized, I haven't talked about Steve much lately. Usually I can't shut up about the guy.

Well, first let's talk about what he's been up to. He went TDY to Guam at the beginning of June. From what I've always heard was that those last weeks, or maybe a month or two. Wellll, Steve will be there until November. The way he explained it to me was that he will most likely be there 179 days, because at 180 days it is considered a tour of duty. He said he probably wouldn't leave any earlier, because they want him there the max time. He also said that even if he did go over the 179 days, they could say "Hey, jk, no TOD, but here's a pin."

Oh how I love the Air Force.

So right now, I'll most likely see Steve in less than 100 days. I'll get to see him after not seeing him for over a year. I am so excited.

And then it'll all go away, because he'll be leaving for Korea for a year. I keep begging him to just let me go with him, and we'll do the two year thing. For some reason he thinks that's a bad idea. Heh.

So back to Guam. Steve was excited to travel. That was a big part of why he wanted to be in the AF.

Here's something about Steve. He changes his mind more than anyone I know. He always likes something different, wants something different, is going to do something different. Sometimes I joke that I'm the only thing he's liked for a significant amount of time. So, because of his mind changing, he decided he's tired of being on an island. He hates palm trees. He doesn't like the beach. He misses North Dakota.

I had to remind him that he had a long list of reasons why he hated North Dakota, and how he said he would never go back. Hmmm.

In the kitchen.

I've been cooking a lot lately. There is something so therapeutic about it for me. It calms me. It's comforting. It keeps my mind off of everything else.

Mostly what I love is baking. I love to bake. Cookies, cakes, brownies, bread- anything really. It's funny, a big part of what I like about cooking is the order of it. You have to do the steps right. You have to measure right. Strangely though, another thing I like about it is tweaking the recipe. It is very common for me to change something. For example, last night I made zucchini muffins, but instead of cinnamon, I used cocoa powder, and then drizzled chocolate on top. Not a huge change, but it made it mine.

I guess that says a lot about how I am about most things. I tend to change things in some way that fits me more. I'd rather change other things than change myself. That can be a good thing or a bad thing. But it's me.

Finally.

I think things are finally pulling together. My birthday was yesterday, so I guess that gave me some luck.


Nothing is set in stone, so I don't want to talk about it quite yet, but here's a few teasers...


I'll probably be moving out soon. The money thing isn't sucking as bad right now. Basically things are looking up.



I'm sorry for the lamest post ever.

Dun...dun dun dun.. duuuun [My sad attempt at suspense music}

So, I haven't written about this because I don't want to jinx it by getting too excited, but I'm way past that. I had a job interview at a salon a few weeks ago, and then a technical interview (where they watch me do haircuts) a week ago today. It all sounded really good, they said they liked me, blah blah blah.

So I basically thought I was set. The lady told me to expect a call by Thursday to hear if I got the job or not. Last Thursday. So here it is, almost a week later. I've been calling every other day or so to talk to the manager I interviewed with, and she hasn't been there. I don't know if that is BS or what, but today I finally asked when she would be in. She's supposed to be there tomorrow 8-2 (which I think, legally, they weren't supposed to tell me. Woops). I'll be calling tomorrow. If she 'isn't there' I'll just assume that she's blowing me off. I've left a few messages with my name asking her to call me back. If after that she doesn't call me, and if she 'isn't there' when I was told she would be, I think I'll have to give up.

This is so frustrating. I seriously thought I had this job. Why am I so unemployable?

So please keep me in your thoughts. I need a job so badly.

Pause.

I don't really have much to say. Ok, that isn't true, but I can't right now. Someday, but not today.

What's new with me?


-Still waiting to hear back about a job.
-About 3 1/2 months until Steve comes home.
-It's my birthday next week!
-I keep burning my hands when I cook. Ouch.

I so badly want to write more, but I just don't have anything to say! My life is at such a standstill right now. I mostly just hang out around the house, or go to the library to use the internet. My car had some issues, but that isn't anything big.

How can I blog, and keep track of my life, when there isn't anything to keep track of? Frustrating, but I'm working on it.