I failed on day 5, but I was sick. [Days 5 and 6]

Day 05- A picture of somewhere you’ve been to. And a truth- something you hope to do in your life.

The one thing I most want to do in my life is be a mom. :)


Day 06- Favorite super hero and why. And a truth- something you hope you never have to do.
I don't have a favorite super hero. I never really was into them too much. I guess Spider Man is pretty cool though.

I hope I never have to deal with major illnesses, in me or my family. I can't imagine that being easy at all.

I have newses! Yes, newses.

I am a terrible blogger. I've admitted it in the past, and I'll admit it now. I suck.

I actually have a pretty good excuse this time! I moved. I didn't move very far, but I did in fact move. I probably lived with my parents longer than any of my friends. Hell, Steve moved out when he was 16. Anyway, I'm 20, and I'm now out of my parents home.

This might sound weird, but let me tell you something. I would probably be fine if I lived with my parents until I moved with Steve. However, I have some things I want. I want to know that I can take care of myself. I want to be able to live on my own before I spend the rest of my life living with someone. Ok, so I didn't make a huge leap right away. I moved in with my sister and her husband. I'm taking baby steps though. I'm hoping to be in my own place by the end of the year.


I WILL be buying a new charger for my laptop next week, so I really hope to get back into the swing of blogging.

And just for a bonus, here's two of my new roomies.

One month down, finally starting to move forward.

I would just like to first point out that I still don't have constant access to a computer, so I'm blaming my lack of posting on that.

I'm actually on more of an upswing right now. Things were down, and they were very down. I'm sort of attempting a lifestyle change right now. I figure that once I get myself a certain way on the outside*, maybe it will cross over to the inside.

*While this does include things like losing weight and actually doing my hair every day, I mean it in more of a "people see me as happy and put together and focused and whatnot" sort of way.

So anyhoozle. I seriously think my brain only gets so much focused writing time in a week. I've been emailing Steve so much lately that I can't really think of anything when I finally get around to blogging.

I'm looking for a different job, the last one didn't work out. Basically I have no clients.

I've been playing softball on the company team where my sister works.

I decided I'm going to be a runnner. I'm about 2 miles into it, but I also just started two days ago.

Since I've been paying attention to my eating and being more active, I've lost 2 pounds.

I miss Steve.

He's been in Guam a month and I'm sick of it. About five more months to go though. Blegh.

I figured out my problem. I’m always waiting for what I want. Always. First I was waiting to graduate high school, so I could go to beauty school. Then my parents said I had to get a degree before they would pay for it. Luckily, that only lasted a semester. Then I waited to finish school.






Oh, and it happens with Steve too. I waited for him to finish boot camp and tech school. Then we had to wait for a new class for tech school, so he was there a month longer. Then there was the constant waiting until the next time we saw each other. Then, we were waiting for me to graduate so I could move up there.



That’s about where we are now. And still waiting. Oh, I forgot to share the good news. I got a job. Yeah, I called this lady about a job, one of my clients get her nails done there, and she recommended me. I went in, expecting an interview. Basically she just told me about the salon and how everything works. I had the job just like that. It’s a booth rental, so I just pay her rent every week, and basically run my own business out of her salon.



Awesome, right? Yeah I thought so too. Except I have no money to get started with. I need rent money, I need my own products, I need color. It really isn’t a lot. But I have NOTHING.



So what, I finally finish cosmo school, and I go work at a restaurant or department store, just so I can afford the job I want?



I just don’t know where to go from here. I thought about getting a small loan, but I have no income, no credit, nothing. My parents won’t cosign, Steve thinks I’m crazy for getting a loan. I don’t know what to do. I guess I have to get a job, but I don’t want to. I know that might sound stupid, but I feel like I’m at my breaking point right now. I don’t know how much longer I can keep waiting.

It doesn’t help that I’m constantly waiting on my relationship with Steve. And I will be for as long as he is in the military. Nothing ever is just easy. Boot camp was basically the last thing that went like it was supposed to. Tech school was a month longer than it was supposed to be. Then he got stationed in the shittiest place ever. I don’t WANT to move to North Dakota. I can deal with it though, but it’s just another thing under the negatives. Man, I can’t believe how bad it was when I had to wait 3 months to see him. Here I am, almost 8 months out.



So now Steve is going on a TDY. Far, far away until October. That will be more than a year of us not seeing each other. I feel bad complaining about it, because he’s not deployed. I don’t have to deal with being terrified for his safety. That’s a big part of it though. Bear with me before you let that bother you.



Steve isn’t in a warzone. He’s not stuck across the ocean. Well, now he’s going to be, but he hasn’t been for the last 6 months. He’s been 1600 miles away. That's it. Easy flying distance. I just don’t understand how we just haven’t figured out a way to see each other for this long. It’s like, of course he has to go away now. Because we weren’t using the time we had.

Alright, so I’ll get through the next five months. I have no idea how the hell I’m going to do it, but I will. I don’t have any other choice. I love him so much, I’ll always wait.

So guess what happens after that! He’ll be back in ND for a few months, and then he’s off to Korea for a year. Really? Come on.

Yeah, so I got it all out.







Oh, let me add. Steve thinks that once I start working, it will be easier for me and I won’t miss him as much. Yeah right. Thanks babe, but no, that’s not how it works. I wish I could compartmentalize like you.

My Cosmo School Graduation! [otherwise known as the day I ate confetti]

I got my graduation pictures today! My brother in law has a photography business, so he took pictures, edited them, and uploaded them to his website, so it took a bit for me to get them. I'm going to do a seperate post with the pictures I took with my teachers and friends. That one will be more of a 'my beauty school experience'. I can't corrupt my graduation post.

This is my station, decorated by my mom and sister (she's the one in the picture above).

Graduation station, graduation outfit.

I got to wear color, jeans, and opened toed shoes. Woo! By the way, the reason that is exciting is because our dresscode is black and white, closed shoes.

So anyway, graduations at my school aren't a huge deal. You get to get free services done, which is really nice. I got a manicure and pedicure, and then Stephanie styled my hair. I didn't really need anything else done, and I didn't want to pack too many things into my day.

This really isn't a great picture of any of us, but I still like it.

Aside from getting services done, you get to wear your graduation outfit a few hours before you graduate, then at the time of the graduation, you get called into the directors office.

They don't really do anything in there, but ask if you have any questions or need anything. While you're in there, everyone comes out from the classrooms and from doing clients and line up and start cheering, then you walk down the row of people, they cheer, there's usually cake. Not too much, but just graduating is enough.

Oh, did I mention that my mom brought TONS of confetti and silly string? Yeah.

Ok, so this isn't a great picture, but it's funny. This was me spitting out a mouthful of confetti. This stuff got everywhere. I'm pretty sure I ate some. It also stuck to my chest.

Oh, and one of my teachers thought it would be a good idea to shove some down my sister's shirt... I'm so proud of Bri for holding her composure. She just made threats later after we left.

Oh man. I did it. I graduated.

A lot of people were asking me all day if I was SOOOO excited, and of course I was, but I wasn't hyped up all day. It was just another day, except I was graduating. Well, it hit me a little harder when I was in the directors office. My heart was going a million miles an hour, I felt a little shaky. It was so good to finally know that I was done. I did what I've wanted to do for years.

And now I get to have a career that I love. Something that I went to school for, studied for, worked my ass off for.

There are a few more things I could include in the post. How I couldn't even get through my graduation day without people trying to start chick-drama. How my hours got messed up, so I had to stay an hour after my graduation.  Just little crappy things from the day, but those things don't matter, they aren't the things I want to remember about this.

Like I said in the beginning, I want to do a post about my experience in school, the people, all of that. But that is going to have the bad things as well as the good things, so I guess this is it for my graduation!

2010

So here are some of the things that I hope to accomplish this year:

1. Graduate cosmo school
2. Get my licsense in AZ
3. Move to ND
4. Get my license in ND
5. Stay organized
6. Find a job in a salon that I love



There are other things that I want to do, but they don't really go on my goal list. They are things that I can't just check off, they take a few more steps. I'm 19 years old. I have a lot of changes in my life. I feel like this is my year to really grow up. I've been in this limbo area of being a kid and being an adult for so long.

This is my year.

I'm going to be out of school. I'm going to start my career. Wow. This year, I'm going to be a cosmetologist. I'm going to work in a salon. I'm going to move out of state, by myself. Well, to Steve, but without my family.


I'm just excited about the changes that are coming.
I'm so ready.